I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
Randomize
