Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
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