We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
Randomize
