I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Randomize
