How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
