check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I woke up with my face in a pile of pancakes and 3000 mistakes.
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
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