Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize