But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
Randomize
