In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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