is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
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