Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Randomize
