I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
Randomize