Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
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