god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
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