That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
Randomize
