I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
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