Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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