you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
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