Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
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