Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
Randomize
