Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
Terrible idea I love it
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
