Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
I have two black x marks on my hands.
Yep you got cut off last night after a stripper bent over in front of you and you screamed very loudly 'I can see your soul from here'
damnit I wish I could remember that.
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
Randomize
