Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
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