So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
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