..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
