I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
