Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
Randomize
