Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
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