she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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