Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
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