I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
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