Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
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