He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Randomize
