three words: i give head
three words: not that well
nutella sex= disaster
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
You are the jesus of drinking
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
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