The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
Randomize
