I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
Randomize
