Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
I CAN MOONWALK!
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
Still dying that you shit outside
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
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