listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
Randomize
