Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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