so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
Randomize
