super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize
