i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
I wish I only lived at night.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
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