I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
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