I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
sex in a hospital.. check
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Randomize
