whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
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