the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
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