Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Randomize
