I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Randomize
