well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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