I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
She's the barista slut.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
