try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
The lady at the Humaine Society gave me her nephew's number because I seem like a loving and caring person.
Does she know that each time you've adopted a new cat in the past year it's because some guy stopped fucking you and you don't want to eat your feelings?
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
Randomize
