just come out here and I will go home with you...
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
Randomize
